This is your life.
This week, my sister flew out to Utah to an anorexic treatment centre and obviously the topic is weighing heavily on my mind. I realise it is different from the normal tone of the blog, but eating disorders are a reality everywhere – even for runners.
I wish that I could sit down with everyone struggling with a “nervosia” of any kind and have a little chat. I would love to show them the other side of eating disorders that the media never shows. (There always is another side). Putting aside any physical damage that destroys any ability to have children or damages your I.Q. or weakens your heart, I would say that it not only destroys your bones, but it destroys your relationships with other people. It robs you of those free moments of carefree thoughts. It sentences you to a life of guilt.
And then it begins on the people you love.
Anorexia is devastating to families. We have been living with one in our house for 5 years and it has left gaping wounds for everyone. Parents are forced to focus on the affected child and not on each other, and their relationship weakens as a result. There are feelings of sibling worthlessness because of the massive attention centred on the anorexic and they often turn to radical measures to deal with the pressure. Anorexia consumes you and those you love.
Why the soap box proclaimations today? I just got a text message from my mom, saying ” We did the right thing. She is safe and cared for here. Now it is time to go home and heal.”
Go home and heal indeed. It has been a rough few years since anorexia entered the scene. My middle sister battled depression and overcame it.
Old picture. But I love it. Nothing could hold her down – she overcame it!
My parents had to watch all of their children engage in self destructive behaviour but have stuck by each other’s side through it all. It hasn’t always been perfect, but it’s been real.
And me? Well, I have alluded to this in the past, but I struggled a few years back with an eating disorder as well.
Luckily, it has a happy ending.
We have all physically healed. Now it is time to pick up the pieces left over from the battle and put it back together again.
I am so fortunate to have a beautiful family that loves me and is willing to battle out the hard times together. Anorexia may have broken us, but it will not destroy us.
(because we are tough like a biker gang.)
So if you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, be gentle…on yourself, on them. It is no one’s fault and it’s real. People are beautiful, lives are meant to be lived and anorexia will rob you of that life. You have one shot.
I will leave you with the lyrics of This Is Your Life by the Newsboys:
This is your life
Treat yourself right
Treat others right
Live like you know you should
This is life
Fight the good fight
Fight for what’s right
Do what you know you should.
keepingsteady says
I just had to come out of lurking to say: my heart goes out to you and your family. I know what it’s like … my younger sister has been in and out of treatment for anorexia for the last 7 years (November 1, 2003, the date her struggles became known to my family, is forever etched in my mind). Everything you’ve said in this post 100% resonated with me. Just hang in there, keep going, and keep believing your sister will overcome this. She’s lucky to have a strong and supportive family by her side.
Jessica says
My prayers are with you. Thank you for your kind words.
Kelsey says
wow, clearly now all 3 of you can say you are eachothers rock. unfortunately it sucks that you can each relate to having come from self-destructive behavior, but you look at it as the glue between your compassion for eachother, as well as strength for what you’ve managed to come out of! The ‘Family Unit’ is vital for everyone, not just those with eating disorders, and because it doesnt exist for some, it usually makes their roads that much harder. You are so inspiring, all of you ladies are inspiring- and you are so truly fortunate to have them by your side to support you and vice versa. <3 <3
xoxo
Angela @ Eat Spin Run Repeat says
Oh my goodness. Another Newsboys fan. I thought I was the only one. They are AMAZING!!! Entertaining Angels is one of my favourites, and Something Beautiful is one of my favourite long run songs! I’m really sorry to hear about your sister, but I’m so happy that she’s getting help. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you and your family. Last year my family went through a lot of drama and it was certainly difficult on me, but it sounds like this has been going on in your family for a long time. If you ever need a chat, lemme know! 🙂
RunningBlonde says
Thanks for the words of wisdom/experience. In the past I have often thought that an eating disorder would be the only way out of my struggle with weight. I need to keep focused on health and on the reasons you pointed out to not “go there”.
I, too, am a Newsboys fan and love that song.
whisperedlonging says
Thank you.
This was just pounding with determined hope.
Kristin says
My heart goes out to you and also is cheering you on! Keep on sticking together & fighting the battles…