On being a fitness instructor (it’s a lot cheaper to just buy a warmer sweater…)

I became a fitness instructor by accident.

Really.

I took a job at a local gym and while my coworkers bounced, jumped and twirled in the near by studio, I filed papers, answered phones and well, cleaned bathrooms. It wasn’t that I thought it was going to be a glamorous job, but I was also cold. One thing no one seems to think about is how cold a gym is for someone who is not bouncing, jumping or twirling. And the person who is not doing the moving doesn’t think that small detail through until much too late.

I wanted to be warm. So I signed up for a CanFitPro certification course in Toronto thinking it would fly by (it didn’t), it would be short (it wasn’t) and that it would be easy. (It wasn’t).

Soon, I was “uming” my way through aerobics choreography at the front of a studio to a stern looking proctor after handing her proof that I really did pass the written portion. The practical portion went horribly, but suddenly I was cast in front of a studio full of expectant (and paying) faces. Which is where the art of BS that can only come from having an English degree was mustered.

Almost a year later, I am shooting the breeze with my clients and have a Pilates and Spin Certification added onto my FIS. (Fitness Instructor Certification) I also have a host of catch phrases in my arsenal.

In a spin class: How are your shoulders? Are they back and down? You are working at about a level 8, yes?

In a glider class: Think of the abs you will have after this! I am right here with you, KEEP PUSHING! (On second thought, I maybe should have been a delivery nurse…)

In a Pilates class: Use your breath, inhale…exhale. Engage your pelvic floor. (Yes…sometimes it is hard to teach with a straight face. Pilates is riddled with sexual innuendos. )

In a Cardio Fusion class: Those burpees won’t do themselves…MOVE IT! HA! HA! HA! (I am not laughing at my clients, rather speaking to them as horses….it’s a Mennonite thing).

I change my clothes an average of 5 times a day and I have a separate drawer for sports bras.

I take upwards to 3 showers a day and carry batteries in my purse for my microphone.

4 am is an acceptable wake up time.

I eat approximately 3 x more than the average female and have mastered the art of changing in front of someone without them actually seeing anything.

I still suck at the grapevine.

I love it though. Some weeks it can be a bit taxing but all in all, I love the people, the atmosphere and the free gym memberships. 🙂

I have to say though, if you are cold at work, it is a lot cheaper to buy a warmer sweater.

Have a fabulous weekend, dearies. I am headed to a cottage to spend the weekend snowboarding with my family. May you have a wonderful, relaxing weekend.