For anyone who needs a bit of a boost today
Occasionally, I write something and leave it in draft form for ages. This is one of those posts. It helps for weeks like this one where I am crazy busy and it ensures that I don’t just throw a slapped together post out there for you to read. This weekend, I am attending a gala and surrounding events for work, a training camp and AR wrap up party, a Performance Project Party and doing some serious training otherwise. So in the spirit of trying to give you something quality instead of an “I didn’t have time so here are some random thoughts”, I give you this post:
As a female that competes regularly in male dominated sports, I find myself training almost exclusively with men. And I never cease to marvel at how absolutely differently we operate.
I find that no matter how many gentlemen I poll, none of them can understand that I won’t wear a certain bike jersey because it doesn’t make me “feel good.” To them, it is the same as all the other jersey’s but I have inexplicably deemed it offensive. This extends to the whole of my wardrobe as well. I have pieces of clothing that I wear begrudgingly because I should – whether it is because I paid good money for that shirt or my mother bought me that skirt and so on.
Or sometimes, it’s just not a good hair day. Or a good face day. Or a good ANYTHING day. Do men even get this?
Don’t get me wrong, I am completely comfortable running around in the wilderness, covered in mud with no make up and looking like a complete troll. I have the confidence in myself and my body and my abilities to feel proud in that moment of what I can do and am lost in the adventure of it all.
But any longtime reader of Laces and Lattes knows that I am a strong proponent of self esteem for women and there have been a few things published, spoken and shared recently that lead me to want to address something.
It is totally ok to do what you need to do in order to feel confident.
If it is a chore to wear that jersey, that dress, that shirt and it doesn’t make you feel like a million bucks when you wear it? Get rid of it. Every year, I purge clothes that I haven’t worn in a year or that brought me no satisfaction. It frees up your space to have more of the clothes you DO love, or it just frees up space.
If you want to put on makeup for a 4 am flight or to feel really proud of your marathon photos – do it. I know I do. If I am on a backwoods expedition or adventure racing, I keep it completely barefaced because I end up looking worse as time evolves because mascara is streaming down my face.
If you hate your body, do something about it. I know that the right answer is “accept yourself right now, exactly the way you are.” But what if, for no real reason, you feel fat and ugly? Every single female I have spoken to, when you get down to the nitty gritty, has this experience. My suggestion is to adjust what you can- are you drinking enough water? Are you eating too much sugar and too few veggies? Do you need more healthy fats? Adjust this and you will FEEL better. But never deprive yourself because the core of what I am getting at is that it is important to look after yourself, both mentally and physically.
And for some women, it means having some work done. Like getting new hair. Or new boobs. Or wearing high heels during running season because you need an extra confidence boost that day. That’s ok too. Self acceptance is important but one thing I have found with my sister’s battle with anorexia is that sometimes, you need a little help in that area and that as fellow females, we should probably be supporting rather than tearing each other down.
Take the time in the morning to do what you need to do in order to look and feel your best for the day and then go out and focus on other people. If you don’t feel good about yourself, you won’t be able to focus on anything else. So look after yourselves. Eat healthy. Go running in the sunshine. Wear that mascara and lip gloss. Or don’t. Just do what you need to do to be your best.
Wishing you all a day where your hair is good, your clothes fit perfectly and you like yourself from every angle.